12/10/09: Annelies Goes International

The big day began with a telephone call to tell me we had an emergency with the system at work (I must say, neither of my kids kept or woke me up as much as this 'newborn' system we migrated 2 months ago, LOL. Thankfully I get PAID to deal with this system). There have been too many of these early mornings in the past month, but because we were getting ready to skip the country I had enough energy to deal with what I could before handing it off to my co-workers so I could finish up packing and bring Marco to school.
It was difficult to say goodbye to Marco. He cried a little (he usually does now, the school is still so new for him), which made it even harder. Marco is in good hands while I am gone, getting some quality Daddy-time, and the rest of the time will be with Oma or at school.
I was still packing when Leif arrived to take us to the airport. It was a nice drive to the airport, all the work-worries kind of dropped away and I felt so good getting away from it all and just not thinking about it anymore.
Check-in went quickly, I was in the line for families going through security so I had help from others (it is a bit of manouvering with a child and a stroller by yourself, but not impossible). When we boarded I kind of had a small feeling of "ohmygod, how are we going to survive the next 10 hours? Cheapass Dutch person I am, of course I did not get a seat for Annelies. She was going to be in my lap the whole flight (or on the floor or whatever I could pull together. If I can get something for free, by god, I will. So proud of my roots!!! I was thinking: will Annelies behave or will she be loud and abnoxious? Will I regret not shelling out that additional 800 bucks for another seat (Shit, that IS a lot of money), but that fear was alleviated quickly because there were a lot of kids around us who were louder than she normally tends to be (Yes, that is saying a lot because Annelies, like the Vlaming side of the family, has a good set of pipes and does not shy away from using them).
Takeoff was smooth, I had a bottle for her and she kind of fell asleep as she was drinking. One of the flight attendants came and brought us a crib for her that I was able to put in front of my feet. A word about the service on KLM when you travel with a baby: EXCELLENT. I was impressed and immediately put at ease. The aforementioned steward came and checked on us 4 times during the flight to ensure we were OK. I also sat next to a Mom who had a 5 month old who travels back and forth quite often (she is Dutch, lives in Oakland with her Husband who is from India whom she met when he was doing an MBA in NL). We talked and had a nice time.
Annelies woke up around 3 hours into the flight and was up for about 2 hours. I fed and played with her, then put her back in bed to let her fall asleep which she did. It was awesome. I had a little TV screen where I watched about 4 episodes of the Office and 2 whole movies with no interruption. I was in heaven. Any mother is going to understand me, no kids and no work, no phone just me and a pretty comfy seat (I had the wall in front of me so put up my feet) and my own little TV. That is how I got through the 10 hour flight very quickly. (Almost too quickly, LOL).
Right before we started to land, Annelies woke up (they had opened the little window covers and turned the lights back on) and I repeated the routine from takeoff with a bottle of milk for her, it went beautifully, no crying, no fuss. She is such a trooper!
I will post pics as soon as I can figure out how to load them to my account...

Dec 2, 2009: Happy First Birthday, Annelies!!!

She is ONE!!!!

Unbelievable that one year has passed since Annelies was born. In some ways it went really fast, in others it feels like we have lived a lifetime. One of Annelies' birthday presents was her 1 year checkup with the pedi. Since we are traveling within a week I asked to move her shots to next visit. That way we can be sure she will not have any residual effects from them.

Her stats are AWESOME: 95th percentile for height, 75th for weight and 25th for head circumference. This on the "typical" charts. Dr H (the pedi) is super impressed with how Annelies is doing. She is cooing a lot and says "Hi" appropriately (like when we say it to her), and is starting to wave. We have not done a lot of signing with her, because we need to lear ourselves, something I am planning to focus on more this upcoming year. She sits up and gets herself from sitting to laying down position easily back and forth. Today she said "Bye" (or at least, it sounded like it to Aaron and I). She is crawling, just needs to figure out that it is faster to crawl then to roll to places she wants to go. She babbles a lot, all syllables, with intonation. She will begin with Eric, the ST who has been working with Marco, in January. (When Marco turns 3 his services will mostly come from the LUSD (School District). So I already put in for Annelies to get that spot with him. I learned, above all, to be aggressive, proactive and organized on behalf of my kids. This has helped me with work too, so that has been a good side effect :)

Enclosed are a couple of pics of Annelies and Marco in bath on the eve of Annelies' B-Day.

Oct 17, 2009: Where Is Her Penis?

This little gem of a question was asked to me by 5 year old Riley, my friend Jenna's offspring. I loved it. I loved it because it was so simple. To him, what was lacking in my daughter was not a few brain cells, eyes that go to the side and not up, or any kind of 'look'. To him, she was only different because she does not have a penis. Like any girl would be!

Annelies and I stayed with my friend Jenna and her to kiddo's, the aforementioned Riley and 1 1/2 year old Jace. For 3 days, Annelies basked in the glory of being loved and admired by Riley. Annlies took a bath with Riley, Riley fed Annelies her bottle, he tried to get her down a play slide, helped her play on a toy horse, and told her every 15 minutes that she is beautiful. Jace took it all in stride, but you could kind of tell at times he was thinking: Hey, waitaminutehere, I was the baby...what happpened?!?!

Riley spent the last night we were there at his Dad's place. The next day, when he talked to his mommy, he told her to tell Annelies good bye from him, and to tell her she is beautiful and he loves her. And don't forget to tell her she is beautiful! Yes, I admit that my heart kind of stung at times, knowing that when they are 15 years down the road, most likely she will not be getting that kind of admiration from 'typical' boys her age. That is why we enjoy it now, as much as we can. I must also say, though, that when I saw 17 year old Chris with Annelies (when I visited Robin- see previous post) I thought: "Heck, if Annelies meets someone half as sweet and wonderful as Chris, she will be a lucky girl!"

Oct 16, 2009; Past and Future

Today was a wonderful day. Annelies and I woke up in the Denver area (Aurora to be exact). It was the first full day of our Colorado adventure. Since we did not have any 'dates' until the afternoon, I decided to head North to Greeley, my old College town. We stopped on our way out of town at Starbucks and headed North on I-25. We made it to Greeley by 10 am (I always get up early when I travel, so did Annelies, but she is always early). It was so strange and cool to be back on the campus! We drove around, and I snapped pics on my cellphone to send to Aaron. A lot has changed, a lot of nice new buildings. I loved the campus back then, and it is even nicer now. We parked the car, and took a long walk around Campus. In front of my old dorm, we took a break and I gave Annelies her bottle (see pic). It was so cool to be back. The weather was glorious. It was only today, sitting there looking at Lawrenson Hall in front of me, that I realized how much I appreciate my College days there. It was a rich experience, difficult at times because I funded most of it myself. Stressful sometimes because I worked my way through, and was so often freaked out at the thought about having to support myself afterwards. (Who the heck was going to give me a job??? LOL! Never should have worried about that.) I would not have had it any other way. I sat and reflected and felt good about where I came from. Students there are so nice, I talked with a couple of them. Then I did something I was never able to do during my college time: I spent $200 at the store to buy sweatshirts and T shirts and other gifts. That was awesome!

In the afternoon we headed to Arvada to meet Robin and Teri and their kids. Each of these women has an older son with Ds, and a younger daughter (Robin's daughter Janet is 13, Teri's daughter Suzie is 2). It was great to see Annelies hit it off with Suzie, they played on the floor (Suzie is a quick crawler, but will probably be walking soon). Teri's son Chris held Annelies for a while. Seeing these older kids with Ds was a revelation to me. It showed me how rich Annelies' future has the potential to be. After the visit with Teri, Robin and kids Annelies and I headed to Applebee's to meet Jaime and Makinna (see picture...Annelies giving her Lip Of Discontent to Makinna, LOL). Makinna just turned 10, she is a lovely young girl attending 4th grade in a typical school. She is more like all other 10 yr olds than different. She talks in slang, loves horses, and shoes. She has friends in school who love hanging out with her. Once again, my heart was filled with excitement and hope for Annelies' future.

As I drove home, I reflected back on how this day took me to a piece of my past, and then showed me possibilities for the future.

Oct 10th, 2009: NICU Reunion

Today we were invited to Sutter Roseville, for a reunion of NICU patients from the past year. The NICU has now been open for a year, and we were absolutely lucky that it opened when it did. I recognized all of the nurses who were crucial to our stay, they were all there (except for one) which was AWESOME. We chatted, I took pictures and they lined up to hold Annelies. So cool. They were genuinely happy to see her, and thrilled that she is thriving. I also saw the people whose little girl shared a room with Annelies; they were born on the same day. I took some pics and have an email address to stay in touch. (I always regretted not getting their information before we left, but that time was such a daze for all of us...).
Annelies passed her 10 month B day, unbelievable how quickly time goes. We are planning a trip to CO next week, to visit my friend Jenna and also someone we met since we started this journey. I am so looking forward to it. Some 'girlfriend' time, I am very much due for that! It will be just Annelies and I, and my first plane trip with a baby. Only 2 hours, so it should be OK. If this goes off without a hitch, we will go to NL this December to visit my family. Since Annelies is still 'portable', it is a good opportunity. I regret I never did this with Marco when he was this little, so now I will take that chance.
We are thrilled the fall has arrived. We are looking forward to visit Apple Hill in november (hopefully with friends who have kids- it is a matter of arranging our schedules), and the SUDS walk at the end of the month. I hope to do some kind of Christmas open house this year. It is also time to think about Christmad cards again!!

Oct 4, 2009; Some Pictures

Today was such a lovely day, we are finally getting some fall-like weather. I stayed home with the kiddos, took a walk with them, did a bunch of stuff around the house (unpacked more boxes) and took some pictures of them together "posing" for the first time. So much fun.

Oct 3; Just Some Thoughts

Before I had kids, and was thinking about what it would be like, invariably my mind would wander to the "What Ifs". One of these "What Ifs" happened to be Ds. What is I have a child with Ds. How do parents do it? There is no way I could handle that (I knew nothing about Ds). I also had a hard time believing that parents with a child who had a disability of any kind could possibly love, bond with, and feel proud of that child the way a parent loves a 'typical' child. Little did I know. When Marco was born, one of my first emotions was a feeling of relief. He did not have Ds. I remember looking at Aaron and saying over and over: "He is OK, he is OK". Meaning: "He does not have Ds". I thought that was the key to happiness, my child not having Ds or anything else (the reason I was scared of Ds in particular was my age. It could also have been that I always, deep down -no pun intended!!- have known that this was going to happen, and I always pushed that feeling to the very back of my mind.) Anyway, life with Marco was and is wonderful. Then Annelies came along. And after those first difficult, confusing hours, I learned the best lesson yet. I love my child. First of all; my children are kids before anything else. They happen to have some things going on, and we are getting them the best therapy we can possibly get them. We are learning to be advocates for my kids and we do this with all the love and persistance we can muster. It is the most important job I will ever have, and I am happy to do it. But they are persons. Kids. People. They will eventually be valuable participants in society, like all of us.

Going back to those thought I used to have, I actually felt pity for parents of kids who had disabilities. I now cringe at the idea that someone may feel that way about me. Of all the things that could be the worst (besides anything that directly relates to the health of my kids), the fear that someone might pity me is the worst. Interesting, isn't it? I know there are/will be people who do. And I want to tell them to be happy for me (I mean, how freaking CUTE are they?!?!?!) LOL!!!) Not a day goes by where I don't feel so, so overwhelmingly happy and grateful to have these kids and Aaron in my life.